Goodiebags...

Had a nice night at Kharma with homegirl Gonzalita at the Dermalogica mingle.
Had my skinscreened. Actually the news were better than I thought.
Gonzo gave me a new book to review and two mascaras to test. The book seems very nice.

Got some advice on skinproduct which I'll be trying out. I'm going shopping with other girl, Mi on Saturday so we'll stop by the motherships of fabness NK and pick up some of the stuff. I also need new fall jacket and new boots. This fall I'll spend walking around town on crisp, clear and sunny days in a very english countryside mannor :)

Also made time for a date last night. Had a glass of wine with a guy from SD. He was very nice, lookwise 100% my type but I don't know...We will probably see eachother again soon, so we'll see. Might also meet JE for lunch today. He is a lot of fun, very much a mother-in-laws-dreamguy. My mom would probably like him and for me (in my very childish teenage rebellionway) it's a downside.

Tonight I'm going out with PLF. Haven't seen her in ages so it'll be fun. last night we were out we downed one bottle of Xanté, it seemed like a good idea at the time but I paid for that the next day... :) but we had fun.

Told J about crazy-stalker guy. He promised he'd help me if I needed it. I have done kickboxing for 5 years but it still freaks me out a bit... Ran into him on the street the other day and he actually followed me to a coffeeshop. Damn!

Better get back to work now

Song of the day: Shake ya tailfeather - P Diddy and Nelly

7 lists of 7 things...

7 songs I love:
- Alright - John Legend
- U make me wanna - Usher
- Angel - Sarah McLahlan
- Sometimes in snows in April - Prince
- Walking in my shoes - Depeche Mode
- In the End - Linkin Park
- Clean - Depeche Mode

7 things I like:
- Sunsets
- Lilacs
- Summer
- Champagne
- High heels
- Smiles
- Popcorn

7 cities I love:
- Paris
- Rome
- Florence
- Edinburgh
- Stockholm
- Seville
- Reims

7 inspirations:
- Sis
- Gonzo
- Madonna
- MJB
- Mum Annie James
- Queen Elizabeth I
- Maria Magdalena

7 do's:
- Have a great laugh everyday
- Indulge yourself, because you're worth it
- Surround yourself with people who wants only good things for you
- Believe in yourself and what you are capable of
- Keep your chin up at all times
- Spend quality time with yourself
- Love yourself, if you don't hten who will...

7 don'ts:
- Don't put yourself down
- Don't disrespect others
- Don't sweat the small things
- Don't wear cordoroy pants.... ever
- Don't stress, there's always time
- Don't ever give up
- Don't ever stop looking for answers

7 things I want to do:
- Live in Paris
- Own at least one pair of Manolos
- Shop in New York
- Climb the pyramids
- Travel around the world
- Retire in Tuscany
- Celebrate my 75th birthday

Take care
Song of the day: All 7 - Prince

Getting LOST again pt II

Found the most amazing text online today.
I'm going to translate parts of it:

"When Cain killed Abel, at the dawn of mankind, God called to him and said: Where is your brother Abel?" And Cain called back to God "Am I my brothers keeper?"
The answer is yes. Yes you are your brothers keeper. That is why you are here.
If someone is cold
You shall give him clothes
If someone is hungry
You shall feed him
If someone is afraid
You shall comfort him and give him a place to feel safe
It is just that simple and just that hard
The other one is a stranger, just like you"

That's something to think about, isn't it?!?!

The other J called today. We are having lunch on Friday to catch up. We had a great time when we dated last summer. Just a few dates and then I met A and fell head over heels.
J is nice, very funny and charming, has a good education and a great job. A very "good on paper" -guy :) Just the kind of guy mama'll like... Question is, is he the kind of guy I'll like?!?!
I mean I know I like him but do I like-like-like him? Well we'll see after Friday lunch :)
He has promised as soon as he is better, he has a broken arm, he is going to "abduct" me some place cool. I have no idea where to but I tried to get him to tell me on the phone today but he wouldn't... Could be fun.

I have now 3 weeks left at work and then I have no idea what I'm gonna do. Paris is an option I'm seriously considering, New York is also an option and of course getting a job in Stockholm and staying here would be the easiest thing but I feel like I need to challenge myself a bit now. I've had it to easy for a while now and I need a change of scenery.
Sure, I'll miss my friends but we'll keep in touch. that's why IM was invented :)

Better get back to LOST now. Sawyer is my favorite, Jack is dull, Kate is boring, Locke is cool and the Asian guy is kinda hot ;)

Take care

Song of the day:
Magnet Monster - Space Lords

Confessions

These are my confession:
I miss him I miss him I miss him I miss him I miss him I miss him I miss him...
a little bit less every day.
Now that's said and I won't say it again.

My girl Gonzo is adorable. She is encouraging me to get my fab ass to Paris and I really think I'm going. God, now I feel that excitement inside that I haven't felt in a long time...
I want to find that feeling of happiness again, you know when you feel happy on the inside - where it really matters.

I'll always have Paris :)

What a day...

Have been feeling sick all day. The only upside is that it isn't morningsickness ;)
Am still feeling sick and have a soar throat... A little selfpity is always good.

Anyway, work is ok - am still quite on top of the situation. I guess I don't get it yet... that I'm actually leaving. For the first time in my life I will have absolutely nothing to do. What a thought! If I would be abducted on Saturday night...noone would know on Monday morning since no one would miss me... I wonder what that'll be like.
(Watching Scrubs - love that show :) Zach Braff has the most amazing lips actually...and he is funny to. Do watch Garden State if you have to opportunity)

So, about my pathetic love life... what to do?!?!
Sis thinks J and I are perfect together and she has told me not to let him go.
H thinks he isn't "good enough for me" (her words not mine) and he doesn't treat me in a very nice way.
And me, what do I think...
On the one hand: he is great, he has almost everything I ever wanted in a man, we do have fun together most of the time. Once, when I really needed him he was there for me.
The downside is that I feel like he is looking for something else ie I'm not his type.

I hope we can stay friends. I guess we won't be going to Barcelona... Oh speaking of Barcelona. H&O are going. She said the meanest things about O last time I saw her. I can't believe that he puts up with all the crap. He totally deserves better... Because he is a really nice guy. Speaking of nice guys G is so funny. He ran Lidingoloppet on Saturday, and then we went out for drinks. He insisted on drinking beer even if he'd rather had cocktails - strange but fun...
I'll go to Barca some other time :)

So, what shall I do?!?! Last time I spoke to him...or well I sent a message but I felt quite good about having the guts to do it. So maybe I'll just risk making a total fool of myself and tell him how I feel about it...

I'll sleep on it and decide tomorrow - in a very Gone with the Wind-kind of way :)

Take care
Song of the day: Walking away - Craig David

Love don't live here anymore

Can't even begin to tell you about the date I had on Friday... He was sweet,kind and oh so dull!!!
Sent an SOS text mess to J, but what is it about men... They don't get it, do they. He was supposed to come to my rescue but oh no he was at home playing a videogame or whatever. So I suffered... Don't mean to bash the guy but he is not my man so to speak...

Got home quite early and off to bed.
Spent most of Saturday in front of SATC, managed however to get my laundry done...
Then into the bathroom to do girl's stuff and get beautiful for the M&P-party. Meet up with J and H at Storstad for some drinks and then off to the party. H and I left early due to some...Unexpected company I wasn't to keen on...
Met G and his cousin at Sturehof for a few drinks (mostly vodkalime). I have a new theory: if I stick to the same type of alcohol I don't get as hungovered... Let me tell you: it's not working;)
At least not with vodka. Next time I'll go for champagne instead.

Today was the big familyday:mum and dad have been married for 40 years and this was celebrated with MammaMia - the musical and dinner at Pontus. Very nice. Actually managed to spend an entire evening with my mum and not get into a fight or some twisted teenage sulking. Maybe I'm growing up?!?!

Have been tearing myself up about J lately. I have so much going on right now that I really need his support but on the other hand I can't stand the fact that he is seeing someone else. I do believe I'm as close to being in love as I have ever been... Need to talk about this soon but not yet. On the one hand the best thing for me would be to not talk to him or even see him at all until I'm over totally over him but I don't want to do that. He is so kind, nicer to me than I deserve, and supportive and just great...I need him in my life. He means a lot to me and I want him as my friend. Maybe we need to really "break up" before we can start over as friends. The greatest thing would be to go to Barcelona, have a fab weekend with shopping and laughing and good wine and good food and then end it there and then. This way we could end it in a good place and I'll remember him fondly. BS but I'll try to believe in it.

I'll call him tomorrow...Maybe... Possibly if I can find the strength to do it.

Take care

Song of the day:Separated - Usher

A quiet day

today. It's official: I'm leaving! It feels pretty sad actually. Having a job gives you a certain sense of security.
Applied for the other job today. Sis wrote a great application for me and I sent it today - keep my fingers crossed...

If that doesn't work out I'll look into working in Paris for a while. I mean if I survived Nykoping - Paris can't be that bad....
J called me back today. Didn't tell him about it. I don't want to bother him with my problems but he is incredibly sweet to me. On the upside: I'm now free for a trip to Barcelona whenever. On the downside: no money...
Maybe I'll tell him later...

I actually have a date tomorrow with a guy from SD. Might be fun but I'll have sis as a plan B incase he turns out to be a drag. We are meeting for a drink at 8.
At work everyone is really nice to me. T, K and I had lunch today. T is really funny, he tells all these crazy stories from when he was living in Gotland.
I didn't really get that much done today, didn't seem like anyone else did either.

Tomorrow I get paid so I'm going to look for a new pair of boots for the winterseason. God, there are so many cool clothes out there now and I need to go shopping....

Sunday the family are going to watch MammaMia - the Abba musical and then dinner at Pontus by the Sea - can be nice. And in two week sis and me are going to see Saturday Night Fever starring lovely Andreas from Alcazar :)

Anyway, take care!

Love/E

Song of the day: Never stop - Brand New Heavies

Losing my

...job. My employment will end in one month which feels kinda sad. I thought I would at least get until this summer to find a new job. Felt sad today and called j but he didn't have time to talk. I probably shouldn't lay this on him, it's not really his problem.

Found this really great job I'm applying for today. Sis is helping me write the application.

On the plus side: went by NK to pick up some make up to cheer myself up today and as I walked through Kungsan this really go looking guy came up to me and asked me out :) He is from Jamaica, it's not a very Swedish thing to just walk up to someone on the street and ask them out. Haven't decided if I'm going or not yet.
Am meeting some friends on Friday a bit later for drinks - will be fun. And on Saturday it's Maria's and Peter's party - the theme is RED so I'll be wearing my red dress. I do believe I look a bit like a prostitute in red but what the hell... I know most people who are going.

At work I rule :) I have most of everything under control now which feels good. I will leave everything in order. I don't know who will be taking over after me, supposedly someone in Gothenburg. I'll be getting that information later.
I hope I do get to go to the Finish ceremony in Gothenburg... Oh well, maybe this is the kick in the but I need to get all my other plans going. I will definetly look into the possibility to go work in Paris or New York.
If I were to move abroad I would really miss everyone but I wouldn't be that far away, Paris is only 2h 45 ms by air....

Better go to bed now

Take care
/E

Song of the day:
Losing my religion - REM

Too fast for love

Time flies... sometimes too fast for me to catch up...
I think I missed one day last week, suddenly it was Friday again and I don't know what happened.

The week end was nice but full of stuff. Friday I was home cleaning the place and then my stray friend Nicky came over for some apple martinins. We watched some fashion shows he had on VHS and bitched about fashion.
Saturday I realized that I forgot to turn off my alarmclock....

Saturday night HN had his birthdayexhibition. It was really cool :) He showed some of his favourite items and clothes. Afterwards we went to Nalen for a light dinner and some drinks. They had a really great drinklist. H wasn't there. She was at Storstad with someone and didn't want to join us since she is oh so annoyed that Swedish people are so cheap...
Was probably for the best any way. I'm tired of having to defend my self and all swedish habits that gets her going. Will see her on Saturday though for Marias and Peters party.

Got home at a quite decent hour, shared a cab with sis and T. T has got a new fab job - shout out to her!! Decided to go out for cocktails some night and some dancing, haven't gone dancing in ages... Will be fun!!

Oh and I got a nice surprise too: K, who lives in Bruxelles was at HN's party. It was really nice to see her and her sister again.

The baptism was nice. I got him a small chair, tip from a co-worker. It seems like Tindra, the big sis, liked it the most.

Sunday was spent avoiding creepy date-guys calls and textmessages....
Went for walk and did my duty as a citizen and voted in the church elections. I also, very discretely, covered the bills from the Swedishdemocrats... it's illegal - I know but a little civil disobedience can't hurt :)

Then back to the house to make some calls and Nicky came over again for some SATC and som epopcorn. Made ribs for dinner and enjoyed them with some wine.

Late at night creep date-guy send textmess asking if he could come over. He said that if I really wanted to meet him time and place wouldn't matter. Ok, newsflash: time and place always matters!!! Always! I don't invited someone I've met once and don't really like over at 11 at night when I'm in bed...
Told him that if he wanted a bootycall he was barking up the wrong tree. He claimed that booty wasn't what he wanted and that I should try to be more spontaneous.... I am but not when I'm half asleep...
Anyway, think he is gone for good now, I at least hope so...

Monday I met AT and T to plan our next champagnetasting. We are going for standard/prestige/magnum this time. And also some more about the actual winemaking. Means I must get started on some reading...

Am tired today, due to a naughty conversation with J late last night ;)

Am going to call G about meeting up Saturday night. He is so much fun to hang with.

Better get back to work now. I'm annoyed today due to some peoples total lack of competence...

Take care

Song of the day: Walking in my shoes - Depeche Mode

Fall is here

and with a vengance. This last week has been cold and rainy like it usually is in September.
This obviously means I need to get a new warmer jacket :) and if I have a new jacket I'll be needing boots too...
Will do some serious shopping as soon as I can find the time.

Saturday is HN's birthday. I'm gonna get him that cool belt I saw at HM. He is actually holding a small sale of all of his stuff. Quite a cool idea! I'm dying to see the movie Crash so I'm going to suggest it for Saturday.

Have so much stuff to do at work right now. But tomorrow I'm gonna take some time off to go and visit R, who is in the hospital. He doesn't want flowers so I thought I could bring him a cool magazine so he'll have something to read. At first I intened to pick up something about motorcycles but then...It might not be such a great idea since he crashed on his bike and ended up in the hospital.

Saturday in stepbro's sons baptismceremony. And I, late as usal do not have a gift. So Thursday or Friday I'll go and try to find something for him... Can believe how fast the days are going - feels like I miss at least one day each week.

Better get back to LOST again :)

Take care

Song of the day: Shame - Alexander O'Neil

Dinner with friends

Had a great weekend :)
Friday was spent alone at home: cleaning, watching tv and listening to music. Creepy-date guy called and I, very unwillingly, picked up. He wanted to come over and rent a movie... Damn! He just doesn't know when to quit, does he?!?!? Told him that I was spending a quiet night at home. He insisted on calling me this week and we should met for drinks. Ok, I admit I haven't been totally straight forward but still.
H thinks he is a total psycho. I did actually ask him about the 8 calls last Sunday and he said he never called. Uuuhm...right - ever heard of caller id?!?!

Saturday was great! Got up decently late, had breakfast and then off grocery shopping as friends were coming over for dinner. Decided to make Mole-chicken and Pannacotta. If I may say so myself: I am quite the cook :) It was really great!! For starters I made mushroom sandwiches and we had the De Venoge blanc de noir to go with it. Oh so good :)

With the food we had Riesling from Chile and with the desert my Noe from Jerez.

After some talking about everything from IDOL 2005 to politics we decided to leave the house for some drinks. Sis went home and HN didn't join us either - they had a concert the next day.
H and me met up with G and A at Sturehof for some rasperry carpinoschas and some great laughs. Told G about creppy-date guy and he laughed until he cried...

Sunday was laundry day and then off to sis' concert in Oscarkyrkan. They sang some gospel with was really nice. After my spirit had its share it was time to satify my beautyobsession: watched Batman Begins (3,5/5) with the gorgeous Christian Bale. Nice to see Liam Neeson not being the good guy...

Had a glass of wine and some thai food with H. She is in one of her bitter periods again. This time it's all about how cheap people in Sweden are... and she has to leave because she can't stand it. Was temped to ask he if she found me cheap too, especially after the dinner on Saturday night, but I didn't.
I do think it's all about how you decide to handle things like that. You can get all worked up about it or you could just ignore it... Leaving is not a solution to anything as you are taking you with you wherever you go....

Big shoutout to day to Ali and Carl who got married this weekend :)

Take care
Song of the day:
Georgia on my mind - Ray Charles

Champagne, champagne part II

Had the champagnetasting at Grappe yesterday. It went very well, everyone was very nice and asked a lot of questions. I couldn't answer all of them but Torbjörn was a big help.
After the tasting we had some cheese and I shared another bottle of Pierre Peters with AnnaT.

As Grappe closes quite early we moved on to TBar at Diplomat for some champagnecocktails. Was home at a quite decent hour but quite undecently drunk and sent some very indecent messages to J ;) He was playing records at a club somewhere. Now, that is very cool - he is actually a DJ :)
At least I didn't get caught dancing on the way home this time... ;)

Had an important meeting this morning so the subway was of course late and I had to run most of the way. Am wearing my new ZARA-top today and I, if I may say so myself, look damn nice in it.

Spent most of the morning suffering from the "Day-after" - effect but after lunch it feels better.

Heard that R, my ex since ages, has been in a car accident. He is in hospital with a broken pelvic. Damn, that must hurt. Will call him when I get some time...

So, today is Friday and tomorrow I'm sleeping in!! Gonna be so nice. I really need to cathc up on my sleep as I've been a very busy girl this week.

Gonna spend the rest of the afternoon faking work and looking for great stuff to do in Barcelona with J.

Take care

Song of the day: Robbie Williams - Something beautiful

Fall is

a great season for me. Love the clothes and the weather, well not today as it was raining, but I love those clear, crisp falldays.
I can wear warm clothes, eat indoors and wear sunglasses without any second thoughts.

At work today I rocked :) Was in total control and manage to hold up at least 3 phones and a few other things at the same time... I'll show them that i'm really good at what I do - no doubts about that.
J and I are still planning our possible trip to Barca - it would be great if we actually could do it. I hope I can get some time of.

This Saturday I'm having a dinner party. Have invited H, G, sis, T and J. Tanja is going to Italy so she can't come but H is coming that'll be fun. We are going out for cocktails afterwards. Am probably doing AW with Gonzo on Friday which is usually very funny. Haven't seen her in a while so it'll be great fun.
Haven't decided yet what to eat but the desert is decided PannaCotta so i think I'll go for something light for maincourse.
I also have to prepare for the champagentasting tomorrow. We are tasting grapes this time, should be interesting...

Haven't heard anything from date-weirdo today. Good, maybe he finally got it. He seemed liek a nice person but I simply wasn't interested and absolutely not attracted to him. But I really think calling 8 times in ine morning is way over the top. It's a fine line between courting and stalking :)

Well that's over and done with.

Take care!

Song of the day: Heal the Pain - George Michael

"Someone who doesn't judge me"

A very wise person said that today. The question was: What turns you on? Who do you want to be with? He answered "Someone who doesn't judge me"

That is what I'm looking for too.

T is gone. We apparently didn't have the same opinion about some things. Like having sex on the first date and such... I can't bothered with someone who judges me like that.

Spent a busy day at the office getting all the travels together. Obviously office-idiot had to find some fault with what I was doing. Then I did some shopping with H. We stopped by NK but didn't find anything then onto Zara where I icked up some casual wear for work. Speaking of work: I'm working on getting J to go with me to Barcelona. Think we would have a great time: shopping and partying, sightseeing and doing cool stuff.
Am thinking about putting togheter a dinnerparty on Saturday with G and H. And I'll see if J can join us - either for dinner or later if we go out. Am so dying for some real fun with people who really care about me.

J has been the best: encouraging and supporting. If it hadn't been for him I'd sink like a stone and just vanish. He is much nicer to me than I deserve. I hope I can "repay" him someday.
He is coming over, I hope, some night this week so we can hang out, just the two of us.
There so much more I can say but I'm so tired now...

Take care and remember to surround yourself with people who wants only good thing s for you :)

Song of the day: Keep it moving - MJB

Alca-star gazing

I'm an Alca-star :)
Went to the Alcazar-consert after all on Friday. Some wine with the co-workers made me feel better. Had a surprisingly nice time doing AW in the office.

Met sis, Henri and their ethiopian friend at Gröna Lund and the concert was really great! It's their last performance for now - no one knows when they'll be back. But they ended with fab style and total gala. Lost of dancing and some really cool moves. I think they managed to squeeze in all of their hits in the show. And they where absolutely beautiful!
Met lovely Mats, Magnus' boyfriend and soon to be husband.

Then we ended up at Strand for some wine and talking.
Yesterday was the Kräftskiva at Wessens. Really nice but very cold. Sang a few song and translated them into english for Isakurh. When you think about it most swedish songs are about drinking and/or forgetting your troubles by drinking. No wonder we have a rep to be sad and moody but heavy drinkers :)

Today I'm screening my calls.. due to creepy-Kevin calling. He suggested that he should come over here today for "coffee". Don't get me wrong I do respect a mans whishes to get some but he is not getting any with me... I don't find him very attractive but I don't know how to say that. I wonder if I'll get away with not answering the phone ever again when he calls. I mean when will he get it stop calling. He has called me 8 times today! I would call once, leave a message and leave it at that. Must have some selfrespect and ride. Never ever beg - that's just sad...

If he calls again I will answer and just say 'no'. I suppose this is what A means with my boundry-issues... I'm not good at saying no to things or to people. Usually that's fun cause I end up going to or doing a lot of funny stuff but sometimes it can get me into trouble... like today. He knows where I live, what do I do if he just shows up on my door step?!?!? GOD!

I'll just say that I keep the phone on mute - which is true and that I'm ill - which is close to the truth (am coughing today) and that I'm staying in today - which is almost true and that I'll call him this week - which is not entirely true...

Take care

Song of the day: Singing to heaven - Alcazar

Ego-cuddling...

is always nice! Had my share of that yesterday. First I was totally on top of my jobsituation. All the stuff I finished last night would have broken a weaker spirit ;) Then went on a date with the Kevin-person who has been after me for a while. He waited for me for 45 mns outside my office so he must have been really eager to met me. We had a quite nice time but since I'm not really feeling well I kept it pretty short so I was home at around 8.
Then he started to send me some quite odd textmessages... It's not that I mind getting dirty messages it's just that I don't want to get it from a person I've known for 2 hrs...

And then to totally make my day T called and asked: "where is my woman?" Told him his woman was in bed feeling ill. Too bad cause he wanted me to come over and see his new place. We'll do it some other night... He missed me which I like :)

Was checking out Barcelonatickets today, about 6000 for two tickets to Barca. I'd love to go with J since he is almost my equal when it comes to shopping and partying. Actually I think he is more into partying than me and we have fun together. He is a nice guy (I'm not writing that just cause I know he reads this ;)).

Having some doubts about the Alcazarconsert tonight. As I'm going to the Wessen-party tomorrow I don't think I'll be going tonight and I don't want to go alone...
Am not really feeling well but am feeling happier today. Probably because I got som much done last night and really showed my capacity at work.

Think I'm going to spend Friday night with a nice glass of wine and my new favourite pass-time: not T as one might think, but SuDoku :) and maybe rent a DVD.
If you need me, I'll be on my couch ;)

Take care!

Song of the day: Bring it on home to me - Sam Cooke